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I was also faced with a question mark over my future, as I approached eighteen and I was due to be called up for the forces.Activities were taking place round the country to raise funds for spitfires and women were knitting scarves and socks for the troops. The older men and women were digging for victory and the amount of home grown fruit and vegetables was gradually increasing. Many families were increasing their own food supply by growing their own fruit and vegetables. Small boys and their fathers bred rabbits for slaughter at 1/6d a pound to be sold through local butchers shops, and for which they would receive a receipt and could claim a bran ration to feed their bunnies.It was April 15th when we had received the sad news that both my father and Beanies father had been killed at Tobruk. My mother was devastated, and I had three days off work to be with them. What made the whole event much worse was that there could be no funeral, and no proper grieving. Beanie and I spent our. Eversince then I thought that if I didn't keep my thoughts a secret that i woudbe laughed at, scorned, or critisized. This is one instance that I let myfears get the better of me. I tried do hard to just fit in but it was to no avail. It was as if I wasin the middle of a step and just past the point of no return I found outthat I had ran out road falling flat on my face. I tried to just forgetabout it and was successful from my freshman year till age 24. It was amistake that nearly cost me my life on more that a few occaissions. Durringall that time I put up a wall and for those years I felt that the wall wasweakening. When the wall finnally broke I tried to go to my parents forhelp. Now the result of that meeting was in no way thear fault. I was for allintents and purposes thinking "girl" and was allways quite a bit dramaticand they thought that I was "acting" just to get attention. I feltheartbroken that they didn't see that I was actually telling them, ortrying to tell them my.
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